Friday, October 16, 2015

I do course-correct every 20 years......whether I need it or not.

So I had a real epiphany this morning while talking to my sister, Jamie and then in a follow-up conversation with my wife. Shocking, I know that I shut up long enough to listen to two people. : )

One of the biggest things, if not the biggest thing, that I struggle with is my job. I have a great job......please hear that. I make good money, I sit at a desk and listen to Spotify and eat junk and use my brain instead of my back. Many people wish they had my job. I also have benefits and all the time off I want to take. (translation: We don't have a vacation policy. You take off what you want to take off.)

But, here is my struggle: I'm never happy. Let me tell you why.

So here is how I look at things. In a job, there are priorities:

1. Pay (because that's why we work, to get paid)
2. Benefits (because if there's going to be something 2nd on this list, for a family man, it needs to be benefits)
3. Vacation

And my job has all of these in quite sufficient supply. Again, I'm not complaining. In 4-10 below is where I struggle. (in no particular order)

4. Training
5. Culture
6. Happiness
7. Co-workers
8. Fringe benefits
9. Growth
10. Environment (desk, office, computer, etc.)

I have always had, since I've been in technology, the top three. I have been truly blessed with good pay, full benefits for my family and all the time off I want to take. But where I end up changing jobs every year or two is I let 4-10 get me all upset and push me out the door. Silly, I know. "Be happy about the first three Burkey!"

I'm always kind of chasing to get all of the first three PLUS all (or most) of the last 7. It won't happen in my opinion. There is no job that satisfies all 10. I need to get over it. This is good stuff if you're me. It's a real revelation!

Now, that is what I worked out with my sister on the phone. Here's where my wife took it three-dimensional. My wife said that in the list of my priorities (which you can see here) I'm really messed up. Here is what she meant.

I'm letting DETAILS...UNIMPORTANT, SECONDARY DETAILS from my #4 priority steal my joy and rob me of time and attention on my first three priorities.

Mind = Blown

I'm so caught up in not liking some co-worker or my monitors not being big enough that I chase around new jobs and in the process........I forget about God and our relationship. I upset my wife by changing jobs all of the time. I run my children through the ringer with my mood swings........ it's pitiful, I know.

Now. I don't know what to do about this but I have to believe that this 'awakening' moment today is a start. Not the end, but just a start and being able to do a personal inventory and adjusting your course and attitude is key. It's key my friends. I will be further contemplating this over tacos...rest assured. Let me know your thoughts on this if you're still awake at his point. : ) Scott